::Reflection-My father, myself... I think it was Fr Richard Rohr who said that before the age of thirty, a person spends their life dealing with the pain inflicted upon them by others. After the age of thirty, what has not been transformed then becomes the pain that you inflict upon others.

In the last two months, I have had two young people under the age of thirty have quite significant reactions to me. The reactions were rooted in the resemblance that I have (real or perceived) to their own fathers. In both cases, it was the negative elements of their fathers that I was mirroring to them.

My thoughts are not so much about those two people and their issues. It would not actually be appropriate to share those issues either. What I have been thinking allot about and wanted to reflect upon are two things in particular.

The first thing that I have been thinking allot about is the incredible influence our relationships with our fathers influence and map upon our understanding and experience of God. I am well aquainted with many of the theories and the like, however, seeing the phenomenons power as it plays out in the lives of so many people around me continues to astound me again and again. It has such profound influence and completley overrides any rational or objective capacity a person conjured up in order to resist.

I have sat with one person in particular and when we attempted to engage in a medatative approach to scriptures regarding a loving God, there was an immediate and significant emotional reaction. The brick wall is of course that persons relationship to their father.

What also was quite astounding was to see the two approaches to prayer and scripture in this persons life. The individual in question is someone who has tried to memorise scripture for a large part of their adult life. They probably know more scriptures than I do, and seem able to quote one for just about any occassion. When we discussed their view of God, it was very biblical, very correct, theologically sound.

It started to come undone when I questioned why they continued to struggle with responding in specific situations out of their intellectual understanding of who God is. Intrigued, we continued the conversation and found ourselves having a talk about the meditative approach to scripture again. We cracked open the bible, found one that related to a fathers love for his children, and literally, within seconds, the person was reacting and was eventually moved to a place of tears. They described feelings of being frightened and challenged, and then reverted to their traditional form of scripture engagement, due to the fact that they felt far more in control of the process.

I thought allot about how their concept of God was well differentiated in their minds from their experience of their human father, but once we moved beyond the conceptual, into the realm of their actual experience, it was staggering to see the difference. As far as their emotional experience of God the father, it was almost imposible for them to separate that from their experience of their human father.

I find that I am still considering and reflecting upon the significance of this event.

The second part of my meanderings is as both father and son. I am a dad to Harry and Noah, and often pause to think about how my actions as their dad will effect their understanding and experience of God the father. I often pray that they will be gracious with their fragile, broken dad.

Which led me to consider my own father. Charlie came to this nation as a 13 year old boy, as an economic refugee in the 1960's. He arrived with his two older brothers, a suitcase, and a very shaky command of the English language. The brothers ekked out an existence in what was effectivley an incredibly alien world from the one they had grown up in. I have since discovered the violence of his own upbringing. His problematic start to life, and then having to start all over again in a new country, his finding a partner in my mother and then his attempts to raise a family without so little guidance are feats that I am finding new levels of appreciation for, each time I think about my own fathering, and the way in which my view of God is shaped by this remarkable man.

I find that as I get older, and as I come to terms with my limitations as a dad, the grace that grows in my heart for this remarkable man is a process that is changing my view of God. Yes my view of God had been shaped in a negative way, by my fathers failings. Yet, as I come to appreciate what he tried to do, with the little resources he had at his disposal, I find that my view of both my dad, and my father in heaven are being expanded in ways I didn't think possible, and at this point, with degrees of significance I don't quite understand just right now.

I love my dad. In times past, I vowed I would never do or become some of the parts of him that inflict pain upon those around him. However, as the strange grace effect continues it's work upon my life, I find I want very much to emulate the good and wonderful parts of my father, and in doing so, I am learning about a wonderful God who is becoming awesome to me in ways I could not anticipate.

Labels: Formation, Parenthood, Psychology, Refugees, Theology

  Posted by Stephen @ 2:46 PM   0 comments

::Activism-I promise never to pick on accountants again!

Labels: Activism, Social Justice, Vocation

  Posted by Stephen @ 9:29 AM   0 comments

::Rants-Global Financial Crisis? Been thinking allot about the GFC (Global Financial Crisis) or the US term, GFM (Global Financial Meltdown). I have been thinking about it because since I returned from Bangladesh in January, I have found myself thinking about the many people who I met in that country who's lives are affected far more dramatically, than people here in Australia.

It is a difficult conversation, because you can easily find yourself comparing misery with misery. That is not my intention. Having been made redundant three times in my life means I am aquainted with the pain that financial uncertainty brings. However, in each situation, we were ok. We have an incredible series of safety nets to fall back on in times of financial distress in a place like Australia.

Not so in Bangladesh. The nation is very poor, and so many individuals I met face pretty bleak futures, because of the GFC.

However, the thing I found most difficult to cope with is the term we give the phenomenon. Global: Well, that's a no brainer. Financial: it effects all kinds of financial systems, or the various parts of the one global financial system. Crisis: hmmmm, this is where it gets interesting.

In the early 2000's, George Bush had his administration use the term "Climate Change" as oppossed to the aforementioned "Global Warming". The term "Global Warming" alarmed people, as it probably should! So the administration, in a master stroke of spin, had the crisis "rebranded". Enter: Climate Change. Sounds more like a holiday than a crisis requiring attention.

The same treatment has been given to the GFC. To call it something benign like the Global Financial Crisis takes attention away from two very important issues. The first is that it is not a crisis in the sense that this thing appeared from out of nowhere like some random act of nature. Due to the incredibly unregulated financial markets in the US, financial institutions were able to act in an incredibly cavalier fashion, essentially lying to existing regulation authorities (including the international markets) in order to appear more profitable than they actually were.

In short:

• Banks lent incredibly irresponsibly to people whom the banks knew were not in a position to pay back such house mortgages.
• The bank leaders and managers did so in order to sell more banking products.
• The reason they needed to sell products, was in order to make greater profits.
• The driving force is the greed of the few.

Bank leaders and managers lying in order to satiate greed. So it grieves me no end, to call something that has to do with the powerful few abusing their position for the sake of their own personal greed, something benign like the Global Financial Crisis. Why don't we call it what it is? Global Abuse of Power? Global Corruption Crisis? Financial Institutional Greed Crisis?

The second issue that went through to the keeper is the one of international trade. For decades, the World Bank/International Monetary Fund has been telling the governments of developing countries that if they want loans and investment, then they cannot prop up failing businesses. If a business or corporation fails in their country, they just need to let the market do it's work, which effectivley means, indigenous corporations fail and international (read corporations from places like the USA, UK, Australia and the like) move in and take up the market share.

Failing businesses and corporations in developing nations means incredible pain for workers in parts of the world that do not have the kinds of safety nets that places like the USA, the UK and Australia do.

So, the "GFC" hits, US car manufacturing companies begin to fall over and what happens, they go to their government and ask to be bailed out with tax payer funds. The American senate responds with packages.

So the USA effectivley declares to the world that there are two sets of rules, one for developing nations (who have no negotiating power and have to accept the raw deal given them) and one for developing nations (who have the power to do whatever they want).

The net result of all of the above, is that the communities and the individuals who are most vulnerable, are those in developing countries, and specifically, those from poor communities.

I have been struggling, particularly during this time of Lent, to know how I as an individual follower of Jesus, can somehow respond to this incredibly overwhelming set of unjust systems that wreak havoc on poor communities. As I have contemplated a response, one thought was to share it with others. And so I have.

Grace.

Labels: Culture, Discipleship, Faith, Justice, Theology, Trade

  Posted by Stephen @ 9:46 PM   0 comments

::Rants-Need a laugh? Need a laugh in your day? (NB: This will only make sense to Australians...)

I had heard that Pauline Hanson was running for the Queensland state seat of Beaudesert. I thought that was funny.

Then I read this article in todays Age newspaper, stating that larrikin celebrity footballer, Warwick Capper is going to run against her, to "give her some curry".

There were a few lol's in the office, however the final few paragraphs in the article sealed it for me.

Pauline Hanson, Warwick Capper and Big Brother, all in the one seat, in the upcoming Queensland state election.

Queenslanders: Do you see why your southern friends find you guys a bit funny!?

Labels: Humour, Politics

  Posted by Stephen @ 12:28 PM   0 comments

::Rants-Slum Dog Middle Incomers Saw this article in the Age on Saturday. These guys are Tear field workers. Lisa and I actually stayed with them for a few days in 2002 (I think it was)? Great story, good read.

Labels: Discipleship, India, Lifestyle

  Posted by Stephen @ 9:53 AM   1 comments

::Rants - How I know so much about the fire... In short, I registered with Twitter. I am not a big fan of social networking. Until 2 days ago. In trying to get access about fires, road access and the like, the web sites that you would usually access were either struggling with the weight of visitors, or the information was stale and next to useless.

In frustration, I registered as a Twitter user, and *literally* within seconds, I had found users and channels that were sending updates, *literally* every few seconds. I was getting sensational information about fire locations, road access, even weather conditions, in virtual real time (a few seconds delay).

In the last few days I have become a bit of a Twitter expert. I am part of a community of users that keep each other informed with all sorts of information, including the behavior of opportunistic companies, the needs of different groups in different areas, and great information as to how to be of some practical help.

I know social networking can be a very superficial means of relating (or not relating as a matter of fact!). I know that it can be used to posture, pretense and essentially live a lie.

But in the last few days, I have discovered that it has helped me to find out if my family and neighbors a safe, to connect to old and new friends, trying to figure out how we can best respond to something overwhelming, from so far away (I am still in Queensland!). I am a believer! Peace out (or should I say Tweet out?) to all my Twitter buddies that have kept me in the loop. You know who you are...

PS - I am www.twitter.com/neurosys

Labels: Twitter, Victorian Fires

  Posted by Stephen @ 1:15 PM   0 comments

::Rants-Danny Nilliah Boycott I am still in Queensland trying to do what I can to help a few people who I know, and many I do not. I joined Twitter to try and lend a hand where I can. I cannot believe how so many people are using social networking tools to coordinate relief efforts, pass on information about the fires, road closures and the like, and generally trying to use information to make a meaningful response.

Lisa, my magnificent partner will be working both today and tomorrow in one of the council based relief centres. In addition, she registered us to host a family whose home was destroyed. If you live close to one of the affected areas, can I encourage you to do the same? It would make so much difference to a family who has kids who are enrolled in schools, who have jobs they need to get back to in order to organise financial stability in their lives and such. Call 1800 006 468 to register your home.

I am so proud of so many other followers of Jesus who are faithfully and humbly trying to respond to this unprecedented disaster.

However, I am also deeply ashamed to be associated with a Christian brother of mine, Danny Nilliah of Catch the Fire Ministries. Today he released a statement that is nothing short of mindless, heartless, absolute stupidity, crass callousness, and revealing an incredibly shallow and superficial grasp on theology and the God of all the universe.

He claims that he had a dream that showed Victoria in flames as a result of passing the recent abortion laws. He talks about a god (lower case "g" deliberate as the god he describes is not the God of all the universe, simply one of petty, narrow minded and ignorant, small men who believe that their view of the world is correct and everyone else needs to conform to their twisted views), that has removed his protection from Victoria because of a legislative decision.

As you can tell, I am filled with rage, and I am doing my best to try and direct it towards his idiotic grasp on theology, rather than towards the man himself.

According to Danny, the nightmares that the heroic men and women of the CFA will have to live with for the rest of their lives, are a judgement of God. The images seared upon the imaginations of adults and children who have lost loved ones in the most horrific of ways, is a judgement of God. The sinister fury of a force of nature, so arbitrarily inflicted upon communities, families and individuals, greater than anything else this nation has ever experienced during peacetime, is a judgement of God.

Danny, your comments regarding Islam in the past have shown you to be an ignorant and fearful little man. Your comments regarding this tragedy, at this time, to me, simply reinforce your petty inferiorities. Fancy using this horrific moment in the lives of so many, to grab headlines for your petty and insigificant business that you call a ministry?

I have felt deep shame over your ignorant and uninformed opinions splashed across the media in the past. This most recent attempt at grabbing headlines fills me with so much shame and remorse.

A Franciscan by the name of Richard Rohr says that the only way we can critique the bad, is to practice the better. So I call on all of my brothers and sisters in Christ who are similarly outraged by this mindless and petty attempt to capitalise on the pain and suffering of others to grab a few headlines, to do two things:

1. Ignore him. Just ignore him.
2. Give money to the various appeals and open your homes (see above) to the victims.

Let them not hear about a false god and Christ through the stupidity and pettiness of those such as Danny Nilliah, rather may people experience the presence of Christ through those, who as dear little children, imitate our father in heaven, who is generous, loving, gracious and giving.

Labels: Discipleship, Theology, Victorian Fires

  Posted by Stephen @ 8:48 PM   12 comments

::Rants-Thanks for your thoughts...

Labels: Family, Itinerary, Rants, Victorian Fires

  Posted by Stephen @ 3:59 PM   0 comments